Friday, December 30, 2011

Seriously, I love Starfucker.


Friday, December 2, 2011

Someone Decorated the Office [XMAS]


Congratulations, You Look Like A Douche [PEOPLE WHO SUCK]

From the iPod shuffle clipped to your faux leather jacket to your off-brand Ray Bans and slicked-back greasy guido-tail, your mildly insulting attire makes me want to hurl you (or myself) off the train. Beware of the closing door, please.

P.S. Your dumb f**king designer-paisley-tie makes me want to smack 100 hipsters.
P.P.S. The train conductor just announced the Fulton stop as "Fulton-Wall St-Zucotti Park-99%." Thank you for making me laugh, good sir. You've unknowingly saved a douchy life this morning.
"My 32 G iPhone couldn't handle all my playlists so I grabbed up this sick iPod Shuffle for backup".
Wearing sunglasses under sunless circumstances. Uncomfortable, irritating, creepy. People who do this are an important group featured on the ongoing list: Reasons To Wait Until You're Safely At Work to Put In Your Contacts
"This is my 'I'm Better Than You' Pose. It's taken years to master."